|  | Topic : I'm one of the cool kids now.... |  |
| | | Thatch | | Thor |  |  | | Reg. Date | : | 24/06/2009 | | Posts | : | 3,655 | | Location | : | Savannah, GA, United States |
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| | Posted : 27 Apr 2010 - 18:20 Post title : I'm one of the cool kids now.... | | | Alright all you tea drinkin' nancy boys, best be warned there is a man on this board now and I demand my respect!
That's right bitches, I'm a Harley owner now! (well, temporarily while my bike gets sorted) but I figure since every Harley owner is instantly a badass a borrowed one is just as good.
I give you ... 'the sled'
That's it, cower in fear of my manly manliness. You don't actually need to see me to know that I am the ubermale because I hold the keys (which look strangely like freezer keys for some reason) to the manly man maker ...... A Harley fuckin' Davidon!!!!! 
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Ok, I got that off my chest, now to the bike.
What a piece of shit! Seriously, the first bit, that was all tounge and cheek fun, but this, I'm serious, This thing could make pig shit arrogant. It is a dog. First off, to my surprise the thing feels tiny. I don't know if that is a good thing or bad thing but I got on it and I felt like a circus bear. The seat is very deep and very close, with the floorboards I sit on the thing like a straighback wooden chair (though a very cushy one at that) I tried to get past that though and just roll with it but the thing has the low speed grace of a three legged drunk rhino with a frontal lobotomy. It wallowed out of the parking lot where I finally got it onto a bit of road. Feeling relieved I gave it some wrist and waited......
Sometime after lunch it started to accelerate but that didn't last long till the engine was wringing out it's last half of a horsepower and I had to shift, and shift, and shift and ... I've never shifted so much in my life... up up, down, up, up, down, down, oh damn not that far down yet, back up, down.... down.... down. Once stopped I then was able to understand the throttle blipping. You just attempted to engine brake, much to the engines dismay and then you sit there with the engine feeling as though it would cut out any time. Once I got stopped in a parking lot and just let it go for a while I realized that was it's normal idle but it was neigh on impossible to tell while at the light.
So, off from the light I go, banking left, the bike actually felt a lot lighter than I thought it would, I felt very high on the bike, but it leaned fairly well ... until it didn't. Yeah, they don't really like deep leans. About mid lean the tire let out a very faint 'fuck you' and proceeded to go on strike for the remainder of the curve. I did my best to get the thing back vertical again, luckily succeeding and swearing I'd ever do that again (as well as just general swearing for good measure)
What I haven't covered here is the smoothness of the bike. There is really very good reason for this. In a similar manner as it would be wrong to evoke the word smooth when describing a box of broken glass, or my first attempts to get laid, it would be equally wrong to use that word to describe the road glide. I can see now why Harleys are growing in popularity with women. This thing vibrates like a marital aid. While it is no thrill to ride, with the right anatomy I'm quite sure it's a thrill to rev. Just sitting still i could of prepared margaritas for all those waiting for the light to change, simply put the blender carafe on the handle bars and you've got a rolling bar.
I will say this positive about the bike. The seat is very comfortable and plush. It jams me up against the surprisingly small tank BUT I am quite comfy in my cramped space. Also, the bags are really quite nice. They reminded me a lot of the bags I had on my Old Kawasaki KZ1000 P6 police bike which were very handy. Hmmm, there should probably be something more positive here I can write.... ah yes, the faring, it was nice, good looking thing and I'm sure Verne Troyer was quite happy with the protection it offered but normal humans might need a bit more height from it. Oh, and the radio, yes, that was quite nice for those times you want to forget you are riding a motorcycle, it does the trick. And who wouldn't want to forget they were riding a motorcycle if they were on this thing...
God I hope the dealer calls soon with my tbird.
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| | | HooRad | | Set | |  | | Reg. Date | : | 19/01/2010 | | Posts | : | 280 | | Location | : | Richmond, VA, United States |
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| | Posted : 27 Apr 2010 - 18:39 Post title : Re: I'm one of the cool kids now.... (Re: Thatch) | | |  Thatch, you are the man. Seriously, a perfect writeup. I see that bike and well...  It should make the bird seem that much better when you get her back!
| Not likely to die of natural causes. At least I hope not.
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| | | Birdy68 | | Thor | |  | | Reg. Date | : | 16/07/2009 | | Posts | : | 3,352 | | Location | : | Bad Zurzach, Aargau, Switzerland |
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| | Posted : 27 Apr 2010 - 19:30 Post title : Re: I'm one of the cool kids now.... (Re: Thatch) | | |
*tries to wipe away the tears of laughter - to no avail*
Let me get you an evening of beer.....
| Birdy68
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Leave the pork pies for now - get the sausage rolls while they're hot!
 -x-  -x- 
more info at Fuelly.com
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| | | mat1600 | | Thunderbird | |  | | Reg. Date | : | 06/03/2010 | | Posts | : | 8,596 | | Location | : | Bridlington, Democratic Independant State of Yorkshire, United Kingdom |
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| | Posted : 27 Apr 2010 - 19:45 Post title : Re: I'm one of the cool kids now.... (Re: Thatch) | | |  
Maybe you might not complain about that handle bar vibration on your bird so much now.
Nice one.
PS -what is it with these HD things that make it do the same thing and have the same noise in what ever gear you are in. The only sensation of speed is when you set off, after that the gear lever is something to do while the speed gradually picks up.
| My first natural instinct is to breathe. My second is to evade tax's.
| | Post edited by mat1600 on 27 Apr 2010 - 19:49 |
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| | | zolti | | Thor | |  | | Reg. Date | : | 23/03/2010 | | Posts | : | 3,127 | | Location | : | newcastle , United Kingdom |
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| | Posted : 27 Apr 2010 - 20:33 Post title : Re: I'm one of the cool kids now.... (Re: Thatch) | | | a toast to thatch
the jeremy clarkson of motorcycle analysis
faaaaaaaaaaaantastic,
cant wait for the next harley they offer you....
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| | | ray548 | | Set | |  | | Reg. Date | : | 09/02/2010 | | Posts | : | 299 | | Location | : | sylmar, CA, United States |
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| | Posted : 27 Apr 2010 - 20:56 Post title : Re: I'm one of the cool kids now.... (Re: zolti) | | | Hey, I saw that Harley last weekend at the Hoover Dam, then again I saw it in L.A. and every point in between. I don't think we have to worry about TBs taking over the world. Well, not at least in the near future. I have yet to run into another TB, but hope to one day.
| 2010 TB, 2007 America
2009 Black Bonnie
owned by daughter, but fun to borrow
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| | | KingOfFleece | | Set | | | Reg. Date | : | 30/09/2009 | | Posts | : | 304 | | Location | : | United States |
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| | Posted : 28 Apr 2010 - 01:56 Post title : Re: I'm one of the cool kids now.... (Re: ray548) | | | And they stand in line to buy them. Go figure. A friend of mine about took his eye out with a new H-D boner yesterday-and he traded a 1800 VTX with NOx for it! Talk about a step down. The same guy would not even CONSIDER a 'Bird.
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| | | daz | | Zeus | |  | | Reg. Date | : | 12/05/2009 | | Posts | : | 7,709 | | Location | : | United States |
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| | Posted : 28 Apr 2010 - 02:36 Post title : Re: I'm one of the cool kids now.... (Re: Thatch) | | | Amazing what people will ride and how much they'll pay for it just to be able to say they own a harley ain't it? Sorta like working extra hard in school to earn an F. I don't think you'll find too many harleys in the mensa parking lot. 
| 2010 Blue/White Thunderbird, "Brutus". 1700 kit, short tors, gutted cat, UNI filter, filter seal off, custom tune. Brutus in his native habitat: Link
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| | | Pappasgarage | | Set | |  | | Reg. Date | : | 05/10/2009 | | Posts | : | 371 | | Location | : | Espoo, snowbird in California, Finland |
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| | Posted : 28 Apr 2010 - 06:43 Post title : Re: I'm one of the cool kids now.... (Re: daz) | | | Saw one or two at the River Run
| Speedmaster 2004 in Espoo Fi, Rocket3 Touring 2014 in Oceanside Ca. IBA Finland SS1000
and T-Bird 09 gone
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| | | Birdy68 | | Thor | | | | Reg. Date | : | 16/07/2009 | | Posts | : | 3,352 | | Location | : | Bad Zurzach, Aargau, Switzerland |
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| | Posted : 28 Apr 2010 - 07:12 Post title : Re: I'm one of the cool kids now.... (Re: zolti) | | |
zolti wrote:
....the jeremy clarkson of motorcycle analysis.... |
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I'll second that one....
Aaaah - I'd just about stopped laughing until I read the 'turning experience' once again...
| Birdy68
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Leave the pork pies for now - get the sausage rolls while they're hot!
-x- -x-
more info at Fuelly.com
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| | | mr_stang | | Set | |  | | Reg. Date | : | 23/08/2009 | | Posts | : | 271 | | Location | : | East Kurrajong, Australia |
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| | Posted : 28 Apr 2010 - 08:07 Post title : Re: I'm one of the cool kids now.... (Re: Birdy68) | | | I think I am cooler than you Thatch. I got give one of these when my bike was in having the coolant fixed.
My 15 year old daughter was *not* impressed when I took her to work on it!
Stan
Link
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| | | Thatch | | Thor | | | | Reg. Date | : | 24/06/2009 | | Posts | : | 3,655 | | Location | : | Savannah, GA, United States |
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| | Posted : 28 Apr 2010 - 12:25 Post title : Re: I'm one of the cool kids now.... (Re: mr_stang) | | | zolti wrote:
....the jeremy clarkson of motorcycle analysis....
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Funny, that hadn't dawned on me but I went back and reread it in a Clarkson voice and it worked for a good 80% of it. I would say I was channeling my inner curmudgeon but that would suggest there was part of me that wasn't curmudgeonly, which is simply untrue.
mr_stang wrote:
I think I am cooler than you Thatch. I got give one of these when my bike was in having the coolant fixed.
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That is a damn fine ride there Stang. Funny you bring that up. I was riding back from my daughters recital last night on this fine piece of American steel, continuing to enjoy it's road prowess, trying to figure out how best to encapsulate the riding experience. I believe I've found it.
Granted it doesn't lean quite as well, but with new tires I think the Harley could make a showing of it. The seating is eerily similar and the nice basket up front does just as good a job carrying around your incontinence products as does the harley bags. 0-60 times should be awfully close but top end speed should tip in the Harley's favor, simply because there are no hills to go down in the mall.
The great thing about this comparison that I struck on was, these two vehicles are essentially for the same demographic. I now know why I see so many of both of them.
| | Post edited by Thatch on 28 Apr 2010 - 12:26 |
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| | | Truss | | Set | |  | | Reg. Date | : | 17/10/2009 | | Posts | : | 146 | | Location | : | Canada |
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| | Posted : 28 Apr 2010 - 23:34 Post title : Re: I'm one of the cool kids now.... (Re: Thatch) | | | By far the most entertaining thread here! Thanks for that Thatch!!!
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| | | Druid | | Jupiter | |  | | Reg. Date | : | 14/10/2009 | | Posts | : | 1,359 | | Location | : | United Kingdom |
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| | Posted : 29 Apr 2010 - 11:23 Post title : Re: I'm one of the cool kids now.... (Re: Truss) | | | Only just seen this . Very funny thanks Thatch.
So not only is it ugly as sin, its rubbish too. They just look like any other Jap bike heheheh.
| Socialism is the philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery - W.Churchill
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